Love IN a Battlefield – Stay on point

We all disagree.  Find a relationship where people never disagree and you’ll find either a relationship where one person dominates the other or two people who never interact.  It is the nature of being human that we have wants and needs.  Sometimes those desires conflict with our loved one and we argue, we fight.

However, it is all too common that we do not discuss (probably realistic to say argue!) about the issue at hand.  We reach back and pull out the stops.  It’s not about being rude to her friend or her forgetting to pick him up; it becomes about how she forgot to get the mail last week, how his brother has always been rude since they’ve met, how she never gets along with her friends and how he has never supported her job.  We start a disagreement and we bring up firestorm.  It is not fair, it is not healthy and it is not using your innerspouse.

Put yourself in their shoes – you don’t like it when an argument turns into every mistake you’ve ever made so why expect your partner to enjoy it?  It is too easy to fall back to old ways and digging up dirt and pain just because ultimately we are feeling pained by the disagreement.  But remember, this is not an enemy – it is the person you love.  By staying on the reason for the argument, you can quicker solve the issue, compromise and grow.  Stay on point and stay together.

Good life, good love,

 

CH & the IW

The only wreck to be in – the Relationship Emergency Kit (REK)

We pronounce it “wreck” but it’s the REK – Relationship Emergency Kit.  We pronounce it, we endorse it and we ALL need it from time to time.

What is a Relationship Emergency Kit?  It’s a collection of skills, talents, ideas and materials used to save your relationship.  It is a collection of physical items and acts, emotional moods and moments and mental thoughts and awareness.  A REK is used when it’s almost too late, when the emergency is upon you!  Just like in real life disasters, this emergency kit is used when the problems is here.  REKs are also used when you see an emergency coming!

The types of emergencies that relationships face include Communication emergencies, Intimacy emergencies, Financial emergencies and The Cleaner.  We use REKs because we want to save our relationships!  Relationship Emergency Kits should have an Innerspouse, momentos (e.g. CDs, love notes, G.R.A.T.E.s, photographs) and additional items that tie you and your other half together through the good and the bad.  REKs can stop Relationship Decay, reverse damage and heighten your relationship’s current status.

So, is your Emergency Kit ready?

Good life, good love,

CH & the IW

 

Real Talk with the Innerwife – Domestic Violence resources

Middle Way House Domestic Violence Program and Rape Crisis Center of Southern Indiana. We accept survivors from all over the country.
http://www.facebook.com/l/03091C9UgK0jZLXo2khKLOlqfSw/www.middlewayhouse.org

Here are some additional websites:
International Directory of Domestic Violence Agencies
http://www.facebook.com/l/03091gu5aQI6l2IqZIZe9ILtxxw/www.hotpeachpages.net

Indiana Coalition Against Domestic Violence
http://www.facebook.com/l/030911V8H9ikO6tlfOjPGP0KHew/www.icadvinc.org/

Arte Sana is a national Latina-led nonprofit committed to ending sexual violence and other forms of gender-based aggressions
http://www.facebook.com/l/03091aYC0lqaBrZmW3UpzE8J-0A/www.arte-sana.com

The Institute on Domestic Violence in the African American Community
http://www.facebook.com/l/03091s7agug7ZJzNru7mZUOS1ng/www.dvinstitute.org/

Local Northwest Indiana resources:
Gary Comission for Women/Rainbow Shelter
Rainbow (219) 886-1600
The Ark – transitional housing – (219) 882-0021

Haven House in Hammond, IN
(219) 931-2090

St. Jude House in Crown Point, IN
(800) 254-1286

Love IN a Battlefield – Stay On Target

We all argue and we all disagree.  That is a given trait of any situation where humans are building towards goals, even mutual goals, but sometimes with different routes.  The key to arguing is to stay on target.  Often when we start to disagree, we stop talking about just what is making us angry at the time and we branch out to the grass that needed cutting last week, the garbage that never got taken out, the Ex that you bumped into or the way their mother talks down to them.  Only discuss what the point of tension at that moment is and don’t go digging up issues from a hundred years ago.  Whatever it may be, make sure that in the disagreement, amongst staying calm and staying fair, stay on target.

Innerwife.com update – Tips for the Holidays and Wedding Planning

Hi all, check out www.innerwife.com for new links discussing how to survive the upcoming holidays (and still stay a couple!) and tips on wedding planning and surviving the big day for her and for him!

* HO, HO, HELL! TIPS FOR SURVIVING THE HOLIDAY SEASON!

* TYING THE KNOT, NOT THE NOOSE! TIPS FOR THE WEDDING!

Check us out at www.innerwife.com

Good life, good love,

CH & the IW

The Innerwife on Amazon!

IN love or INsane? “Would love be easier if it came with a manual?” How great would it be to have a built-in guide to understanding your boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife? We love help menus on our computers, wouldn’t it be awesome to have an inner help system for the one we love? Discover simple and straightforward How-To lists for truly accepting yourself, dating that special someone and bettering your relationships! * Tired of Fighting? * Making the same mistakes date after date? * Tired of miscommunication leading to World War Eight? * Communicate effectively and Avoid those arguments that hurt feelings * Repair your relationship after major mistakes * Avoid infidelity and growing apart!

Get your copy today!  Click here to buy Love Life, Ultimate Strife, How To Lists from the Innerwife: THE How-To book of Dating, Marrying and Understanding

Join us for Love Life, Ultimate Strife – Real Talk with the Innerwife!

Join us for Love Life, Ultimate Strife – Real Talk with the Innerwife!

• Next Show on Wed, Oct 21st! @ 9pm CDT
• Topic will be: “PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) and its effects on Relationships” at www.blogtalkradio.com/chadhunter
• Guest: PCOS Challenge founder Sasha Ottey

For more information on the Innerwife, join us at www.innerwife.com!

As always, Good Life, Good Love

CH & the IW

August 26th @ 9pm – Real Talk with the Innerwife – “MYSPACE or Yours? The Relationship Dangers of Social Networks – Part 2″

Real Talk with the Innerwife – August 26th at 9pm Central (our new time!) at www.blogtalkradio.com/chadhunter.  Hi all, I want to invite everyone to tune in this Wednesday, August 26th at 9pm Central to www.blogtalkradio.com/chadhunter for “Real Talk with the Innerwife.”  Topic: “MYSPACE or Yours – The Relationship Dangers of Social Networks – Part 2”

Real Talk with the Innerwife – July 8th, 9pm Central at www.blogtalkradio.com/chadhunter

Real Talk with the Innerwife – July 8th at 9pm Central (our new time!) at www.blogtalkradio.com/chadhunter.  Hi all, I want to invite everyone to tune in this Wednesday, July 8th at 9pm Central to www.blogtalkradio.com/chadhunter for “Real Talk with the Innerwife.”  Topic: “Marvin Gaye was Right – Let’s Get It On and Sexual Healing – The Innerwife in the Bedroom!”

Tonight’s the Night! July 1st, 10:00 pm CDT – Real Talk with the Innerwife

Join us tonight at www.blogtalkradio.com/chadhunter.  Feel free to drop us an email at Innerwife@hunterchad.com, join us in the blogtalkradio chat room or call in at (347) 637-2593.